Grief notes

For the back story please see my last post.

Note 1

I realise I am still very much in shock and in grief, today I felt it. I don't really like to share how I feel on Social media  (well not facebook ) because it is personal or maybe it is because I can pretend it is not real.  I know well-wishers and empathic people will post because they care and are empathic but this will only make me cry more but the real truth is If I post about the grief then it becomes real that my Dad has left Earth, so I stay in limbo until I can breathe some more because every time I open up to the reality I feel my heart breaking. The pain of grief is unbearable, but this is normal this is grief and there is nothing I can do about it because in a moment I will be back to normal the door closed and the faucet closed again.

lotus.jpg

 

That is grief.

Self Care for Therapists

 

I remember my first encounter with Burnout I was working as a Beauty and Holistic Therapist at Bliss Clinic in Portobello Road in early 2001; After four years practicing I had to give up bodywork for a long time due to a lack of self-care. I had a good number of regular clients but I could no longer physically work at the level I was used too. I believe my need for external validation of making others feel better was the driving force of allowing my own resources to become dry.

Eventually I moved into Coaching and Training others to become Therapists which again led me to Burnout.  So in 2012 I retired from over-giving and I changed my way of working.

During this time my mentor/therapist would remind me that I have been a classic rescuer so over giving is in my nature.

Over giving is often in the nature of Healers, Artists, Therapists and can be linked to the Karpman Drama triangle ‘PVR’ triangle, where one becomes the Rescuer and gives tirelessly and eventually collapses with exhaustion or become either a victim or persecutor (see video).

“Work is Love made Visible” – Kahlil Gibran

We love our work but there needs to be some exchange because as a Creative Healer our work is our life, but we need to be able to tap into other sources so we can work better.

I like to use the percentage model with my clients; How much percentage does your work take? for example if it is 50% what are the percentages for other areas in your life? for a Healer therapist I believe rest should be very high on your list unless you have a specific project.  This model comes from a more complex model used by the Aztec healers explained by the now departed Healer Elena Avila in her book Women who Glows in the Dark. The Author explains the Aztec model for Healers in more detail.
It is really important for you to have a plan or an ethos for living as a pioneer because anything less would be detrimental to your growth.

Six ways to bring balance and self-care into your life.
1 Community (Partner /Friends/ Family)
2 Rest and Relaxation
3 Exercise
4 Going out in nature
5 Mediation, Prayer, Gratitude, Creativity
6 Healthy Food

If you would like to know more or have some support on self-care, please sign up for our newsletter and join our free course the Creative healing coaching course.

Solar Return of the Muse

From the Wisdom Series

I am just coming out of writers block … even a creative block,  however writing and documenting is calling me back (amongst other things)

So now I return to writing this blog and other things, that will support my Art work and practice.
And now on my Solar ReturnI am reflecting on a very tumultuous, creative, and dynamic year.
I have learned I am more patient, more understanding and more diplomatic than I thought.

I have learned that even through the great and dynamic endingscoupled with smooth and surprising beginnings. I have received support from unexpected sources.

I have learned that Angels and Devils look alike but they walk among us all the time teaching us lessons.

I havelearned when we plan the Creator laughs

I havelearned that time is the greatest healer and also the one of the greatest teachers after LOVE.

I have learned that I didn’t know it all,  and I need to be in the present.

I have learned I needed to trustlife more.

I have learned that my relationship with the Creator needed an overhaul

I have learned that my cat was not trying to kill me.

I have learned that some people may not be happy for you when you’re are soaring as much as they are there when you are falling.

I have learned that bravery creates better situations and courage does not eliminate fear but makes the experiencing manageable.

I have learned that you will find kindness in unexpected places.

I have learned I did not die because I took the alternative path.

I have learned that I am not perfect, not the oracle, and that I can be an incredibly insecure and oversensitive, but that is a by-product of my creative makeup.

I have learned that I am an inspiration to myself

I have learned to embrace the part of me that is an introvert, but I need this to tap into the other worlds that give me inspiration.

I have learned that I am ready to be an adult (somewhat).

Muse (ic) to inspire check out Aja Monet’s brilliant Poetry What I ‘ve learnedhere