Mindful Menopause/Wild Women

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I am seeing a lot of women who are walking around hot sweatly, thinning hair, tired and at their wit's end.  This is the role of the Menopause.

The situation though is that this could be one of the most creative times of a woman’s life but many women are experiencing severe discomfort with the Menopause. I wonder if the level of discomfort during the change has to do with many women trying to function in this very Patriarchal and aggressive western world. Being Peri menopausal I only have symptoms when I am doubting myself or processing a pattern or belief that is familial, and my symptoms come up in the form of heat disappear within in a minute . Fuzzy thinking does happen to me at times, but only comes when I am feeling stressed (which is infrequent because I have a no-nonsense attitude in my life to bullshit and ‘settling‘ in challenging relationships, jobs and friendships). 

So the best option for anybody during this time is to chill out, be present, and stop running on the treadmill because this is a time of rebirth, you are now setting a new path for yourself. This is the time the Body Computer is opening up to becoming Sovereign. (another post on that later) 

Your body is becoming rich with wisdom, and authenticity, but patriarchy states that you are an angry woman on the edge (I believe that is the view of Western / White Male’s patriarchal belief system that wants women to be subservient and well behaved, whilst they desire the women who is full of passion and fire).  Menopause is a time for women to own and understand they have the answers and access to complimentary methods that does work.

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How to navigate the next stage of your life during the Menopause.

I have included a few points to help you on your journey, do not forget to subscribe to my email here so that I can send you the Womb Wisdom free PDF with some more resources on this subject.

  • Be wild, be raw, be truthful, but honour your spirit , and listen to the Triple Goddess ( Intuition) Live as a fully powerful woman in control and acceptance of all her moods.

  • As I type this powerful download I feel my ovaries stirring after a dormant time.  Never in my life have I feel so activated whilst writing. Our body responds to our internal dialogue and external environment so that we can navigate our life accordingly.

  • Love yourself even through your bad days, because your emotions it will work with you in the best way possible.

  • Take that class, change your jobs (yes) and reconsider those toxic relationships.

  • Read up on menopause one place to start is Dr Christian Northrup’s book The Wisdom of Menopause.  There is also a great interview with her and Dr Kelly Brogan MD   click here

And Finally….

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Work with me, your Spiritual Doula.

I want to invite you to work with me during this powerful time of transition and insight. My Creative Healing Method programme will create a full blueprint for you at this next stage of your life. Consider this a reinvention of your life.

Healing and Herbs.

Healing sessions for women.


I am now working alongside a herbalist for a limited time for my Womb Healing, and Coaching sessions. 

I was asked by Herbalist Sophia to sit in my sessions so that she could observe the practice of an established therapist.   I jumped at the chance of working with a Herbalist because of my own love of herbs and secondly, the effect herbs have on the body especially the Uterus and general health of women.  I also feel the energy of two therapists will enhance the healing within a much quicker timeline.



Healing the womb is a revolutionary act.


Taking time for womb healing automatically makes one feel whole again and able to deal with the stresses of life. 

My Womb healing sessions will enable you to have more control over any Gynaecological conditions you are currently experiencing. I cannot create miracles (well according to my clients I can), but I can get you to feel, sleep and think better about your health and your body.

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The Creative Healing Method Coaching programme  
will help you heal from that breakup or give you the confidence to set up that business or connect to your intuition?  This programme will bring more clarity and help you set good boundaries which is always weaker when we are experiencing womb issues.  
(basically, it is going from 1 to 20 in a short space of time). 

Don't take my word for it here are some examples.

R wanted to travel, feel more connected within her self after nine months of the creative healing method she travelled to an exotic location and is now more in her power.

J, wanted more connection and confidence, more boundaries and within six months she felt much clearer and secure in her emotions.  After a year working with me, J was able to set boundaries within several relationships and establish a self-care plan for herself that managed her anxiety levels. 

B had a chronic womb issue which has improved within three months.     
Lastly, T was feeling very isolated and within 6 months she had a job, her own space and is in the process of expanding her life's work and offer.


If any of this speaks to you then book a discovery call with me.

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Marilyn x 




2018 in Review

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All I can say about 2018 is that you Kicked my arse I totally jumped off the cliff to support myself a 100 percent

My spa dates were cancelled, my clothes were recycled and I did not purchase any new shoes in 2019 which meant I consumed very little and my cash went back into my marketing and business.

After my Dad passed over in 2017 and my brother in law six months earlier, I focused on working and making money for others. As soon as 2018 hit I entered a new relationship - with myself.

From the beginning of 2018 I vowed to concentrate on myself (so no love interest with Musicians, Artist, or Poets (apparently according to Liz Green I am the proverbial troubadour so I needed to experience my lament and love by myself and for myself),

It is so interesting in cyber world we talk about ‘Self Love’ but, self Love like any relationship takes work as there is still compromises, and decisions to be made so that one can balance work and life.

In relationships there was a struggle to balance time between my partner and friends, in relationship to self this is still a challenge. I was totally immersed in myself and the joy I felt being in this zone of pure bliss. I now understand how I love because I gave myself that total unconditional love, so now moving forward I need to cater to three groups of humans, myself, my partner and my circle.

During this time I was also aware of the difference between hiding/withdrawing from the world and loving myself, eating, going out dinning and walking for oneself and with oneself, I was running towards my self love not away from the world.

Surrender : mjfontaine

Surrender : mjfontaine

I went to events and concerts, walked, ate in restaurants, all by my self (cue the music) and at times I felt a slight pang but that was my head and conditioning, my heart was fun and having fun.

I never knew this type of bliss existed. - communion with the Creator my creativity flourished also.

My work became deeper and thick with authenticity and transparency. I re discovered places in my business that I neglected and threw money at so I could not deal with those areas. The reduction of funds also made me realise how much I used money as a way to put a band aid on issues that challenged my self worth and confidence, This clarity of my life situation enabled me to look at my business, my boundaries and my worth. How many times do we make a business decision based upon validation? It is surprising how Social media totally dictates how entrepreneurs actually portray themselves online at the cost to their business model.

Since walking my own path and setting a better strategy I got real and practical, learned, applied the steps but checked with my heart to see if the steps were congruent with my values. Where there was confusion I asked the adult part of myself to apply a practical solutions.

Stuff just go more real and I am actually running a proper business MA!

My clients increased, more sales of my products and more engagement,

There are more surprises coming in 2019 which is totally gonna switch up my work.

First I had to check in with my partner - Myself.

Have a great 2019 please see my next post that will have the review questions of 2018

Marilyn x

Podcast rebranding- The Candid Conversations show Episode 17 Shame.

The is the first episode of our Rebranded show now called The Candid Conversations show. 

Today I discuss Shame and Vulnerability and how it affects our daily lives, relationships, jobs and mental health.

 

Trigger warning ! This episode may bring up old feelings so I have included links that you visit and use for support.

 

Music by Rebbz

This episode is sponsered by Willique -Exceptional quality handbags available 

https://www.talkspace.com/

https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_listening_to_shame?language=en 

 

Anodea Judith - Chakras and Shame  https://www.mixcloud.com/alignpodcast/anodea-judith-eastern-body-western-mind-chakra-system-ep-137/

Biodynamic Massage 

Alexander Lowen exercises. 

On intuition

Sometimes I feel like I am fighting my self

My intuition is something that I live by every day and its getting stronger and stronger which is resulting in a battle with me … Its like emu in the it challenges me stretches me and I feel like I am Rod hull trying to straighten what need to be ruffled and what is not for me.

Scenario one

Job proposal ..more work (it’s a recession) Iit is a Bread n Butter job ( you know the ones we do sometimes for pay the bills) but this time my body was scream it had enough of charging the for such services rendered and wanted to make a more clean living… but my FEAR was getting to me . It’s a recession, there won’t be any more work. Those of you who know my philosophy know that I do not really listen to the news or read news paper (well I don’t buy them but I do tend to read the headlines in supermarkets) anyway my ethos has always been follow your true calling no matter what because you always come through with a little faith. The same faith I seemed to be missing until old inner voice became loud and clear

the message in my gut or solar plexus was NO this isn’t for you …

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just like this speaker in my head… Damn

I had to refuse the job I actually felt like I was doing a funny dance like I was two people one leg moving forward to say YES! I will do the job and the other step in back in defiance and shouting ‘enough is enough’ so I looked a picture … I declined the job, and that same afternoon a job offer double the amount came … but you guessed it again is not the job I need to do right now so I keep going until it feels right.(and you guessed it the jobs keep coming).

Now this may seem a little irresponsible but when I chart back my history and the great things I have accomplished have been through tapping into my intuition. Thus the best and most profitable decisions have been listening to my inner guidance. It has never been wrong (when I step out of the way) . However this decision isn’t always easy its actually gives me a headache and it requires 100% responsibility, accountability and some assertiveness (its hard to fight your corner when you have hungry children and a spouse starting at you so your decisions may take a lot of courage and a great deal of common sense. For example is it fear or is it your intuition when you practice history (of starving or feasting ) will let you know if you are dealing with an emotion or true guidance.

So how do we learn to tap into our intuition? by acting on small things before you make decisions for bigger choices. Again knowing the area that rocks you..ie solar plexus or the heart (the area most commonly associated with inner guidance) . Bodywork such as abdominal massage, yoga or energetic exercises, help dissipate anxiety in that area, but the best tool is Meditation that will slow your mind and give you space to listen to your inner voice. I recommend you buy (trust your vibes insert book) or my mp3 podcast of meeting your guide and intuition.

Whatever you do know that it is an interesting and sometimes uncomfortable but highly rewarding journey rock the boat .

Namaste

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5 SELF CARE ACTIVITIES FOR WOMEN DURING THE MONTH OF JUNE.

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Please note this blog post was written days before the London incident on 3rd June 2017 and I believe these activities are needed more than ever.

London, I still love you

As I navigate my diary this month (in between my various business ventures, planning a vacation and just trying to refurbish my kitchen on a budget), I have decided to list the five things that are going to ignite my spirit and self- nourish my soul. Most of these activities are on London so if you are visiting London pay close attention because you can find some very cost effective activities that you can undertake here.

Mental healthdates.

The best way to build self -worth is to take yourself on a mental health or self-care date.  You don't have to fly solo on all of these activities but just once try attending an event on your own.  This will encourage your confidence and enable you to discover some new concepts and hobbies you may not have thought of before.

A woman with an interior life is much more magnetic and interesting because she is able to draw on support from within and requires less external interaction.  So I have curated 5 activities that may give you a sense of spirit. M x

1.  FILM Unbound Vision of the Black Feminine. - BFI SOUTHBANK

Following on from the BFI’s landmark BLACK STAR season last year, UNBOUND: VISIONS OF THE BLACK FEMININE, is a Sight & Sound Deep Focus season, showcasing films created by, and about, black women. This season will include the BFI re-release of Julie Dash’s seminal Daughters of the Dust (1991), which has been lovingly restored for its 25th anniversary. With the freedom to reflect their own lives, black women filmmakers pioneered their way to an extraordinary cinematic legacy.

If you have not watched a film solo then I suggest you treat yourself to a solo date, and this film festival will give you an opportunity to do so.  Alternatively choose a movie here and bring a good 'non-draining' friend who will help you maintain that good vibe and discussion after you have indulged in these thought-provoking films. 

 

2.  Somerset House Perfume - A Sensory Journey Through Contemporary Scent 21 June - 17 Sept 2017

Multi-sensory exhibition featuring ten extraordinary perfumes and their pioneering creators, who have radically changed our perceptions of fragrance over the last 20 years.

#perfumepioneers

3.The Old Hamman & Spa -https://www.oldhammam.co.uk/ North London

The Old Hammam & Spa offers a variety of packages and treatments to suit each individual's needs. Whether you are looking for a gift or simply indulging yourself,

Enjoy a Turkish treat North of the River at this traditional Hammam. This is a cost effective way of experiencing this authentic spa treatment without leaving the country.

 

4. Sensational Butterflies - Natural History Museum http://www.nhm.ac.uk/visit/exhibitions/sensational-butterflies.html

"The exhibition includes a kaleidoscope of colourful species ethically sourced from Central and South America, Africa and Asia"

Follow the trail through a tropical habitat of flowers, vines and foliage. As butterflies fly overhead, you'll pass chomping caterpillars, glistening chrysalises and busy feeding stations.

 

5. Womb Wisdom - A SOLSTICE WORKSHOP

My own Solstice workshop June 24th June - This month join us to meditate and paint at my studio here in London.  This workshop covers Womb wisdom and the purpose of goal setting. CLICK HERE for more.

Let me know if there are any other events or self-care activities you plan to do.

If you have an event you would like me to include for July's 5 of the best please let me know.

ENJOY LONDON

MARILYN

FULL MOON Circle

In the spirit of recycling and sustainability I am showing my older Full Moon circle videos. These videos only talk about the basic planetary affects and not the confidential readings.

Because thereis much content available on the net I want to allow those who support my work access to some content that would otherwise be buried in the ether.  Thereforeevery month I will post basic information for you.

If you wish to be part of the circle which allows you to have full access to the Moon circle rituals and readings then please join our circle below.

People Pleasing Over achieving

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Sometimes finding the right way to start a blog post is like splitting hairs, I have to be motivated to start the topic otherwise being in my head just makes me freeze like a Deer in headlights.  My anxiety and top dog wants to make me stop because the topic is just not 'smart ' enough.  So, I must wait until my heart is ready to stand in its courage and speak its truth and my truth is;

I am a chronic people pleaser and over achiever

I am also very creative with a 1000 ideas per hour moving through me,  I am also good at monetizing those ideas to make them work for me.

After reading this article I realise how it was important to admit, feel and let go of the need to justify why I had so many streams of income (my embarrassment was linked to people judging me for 'being different)..  

Trying to please others and over achievingis like having an addiction because we are never able to satisfy that craving it will always be the next goal to achieve and the next person to please.   I am have a distinction between my creative energy and overachieving people pleasing.

My creative drive is through an inner guidance that sometimes does not make sense, something I felt when I created the paintings for the 2017 Calender.

My people pleasing is from the need to be praised or an idea suggested by others. 

When I first moved into my studio I felt so small like a fraud as I ignored that voice that said "don't worry you will soon fill this up" and within months I created most of the images for my calendar.  But at the time I was doubting who I was and why did I need to have this studio, because the desire to have the studio was my longing not from others suggesting I have it, I pleased my (inner) self.  .

You don’t know what level is your comfort zone until you are challenged, and one of those challenges are to stop pleasing others and start pleasing yourself.

Suggestion: Chose 5 major choicesyou made in your life and write down the reasons behind the choice and who influenced you.

Post your answers in the comments below.

 

Marilyn x

 

Mental Health Awareness Day

Today is Mental Health Awareness day and according to World Health Organisation depression will be the leading illness globally by 2030. if we do not act to combat this disease.

In the UK we have 615 million people suffering from Anxiety and Depression and 1 in 4 people will experience one diagnose Mental health condition, statistics that are higher in Ethnic minorities.

So If we live in a society that caters to our every need why is it that Mental health especially in Young people and those from ethnic backgrounds are on the rise?

Well most answers point to our lifestyle, the breakdown of communities, debt, the breakdown of families, racism, sexism thatall contribute to our mental and emotional distress.

I have candidly explained my own struggle with anxiety as a young woman here

Every year there is a theme for Mental health awareness day and this year the theme is Psychological First aid, and the support people can provide to those in distress.

The World Health organisation has listed tips and ways to support and donate to this cause on their website

I have listed 5 tips on how to cope with Panic attacks and anxiety.

1.  Anxiety and Panic Attacks are normally about an underlying problem so the first step is finding a counsellor or therapist (through your GP or support group) that will help you work through any issues.

2. Exercise or yoga classes will help Anxiety and if your mind is racing then Astanga or Power Yoga will help you because of the active style will encourage you to focus on the postures that will occupy an anxious mind..

3. Complimentary therapies were invaluable to me and my clients when I worked as an Aromatherapist/Healer.  Oils that help Anxiety and depression such as Frankincense will encourages deeper breathing which is hell to somebody hyperventilating due to Anxiety.  

Frankincense - Great for relaxing and slowing your breath and calming the mind.

Geranium - Good for balancing and uplifting your mind.

Bergamot - One of the best oils for Depression (please be careful of sunlight).

Rose essential Oil -  A workshop participant who had severe depression used pure Rose essential oil and found this lifted the depression, excellent for grief also.

4.  The practice of mindfulness ; Being in the present can help, I use my art to help with anxiety or meditation.  Art journallingor working with colouring books can help.

5 The practice of gratitude - Listing small accomplishments of your day, week or life is said to help and improve your mental health.

We also have essential oil sets available in our store or join one of our workshops or courses.

Enjoy this article then please Like and Share.  

Healing Art : The Phoenix

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Acrylic on hardboard.

I wasn't going to show this #workinprogress but as it is a full moon I wanted to share.  The face has changed since I took this photograph.  This paintingis influenced by the Nibiru story and this is the phoenix    " According to the Greek historian Herodotus (b: 484 BC), the phoenix was a mythical bird from Ethiopia. It was spectacularly large, beautiful and adorned with mind-blowing plumage. The historian also reported that the phoenix made a nest cypress branches. Rather preparing to lay eggs, the phoenix was preparing to die. While sitting in the nest, the bird created a great deal of heat, and set itself on fire from its own heat with the cypress serving as kindling. After three days, the phoenix emerged from its own ashes - reborn and released from the sentence of death, able to live on forever" source what is your sign

I am nowcreating a package for those suffering with Creative or physical burnout and this painting comes at a time when rebirth is needed for those who have given a lot and need rejuvenation it is now time.

Self Care for Therapists

 

I remember my first encounter with Burnout I was working as a Beauty and Holistic Therapist at Bliss Clinic in Portobello Road in early 2001; After four years practicing I had to give up bodywork for a long time due to a lack of self-care. I had a good number of regular clients but I could no longer physically work at the level I was used too. I believe my need for external validation of making others feel better was the driving force of allowing my own resources to become dry.

Eventually I moved into Coaching and Training others to become Therapists which again led me to Burnout.  So in 2012 I retired from over-giving and I changed my way of working.

During this time my mentor/therapist would remind me that I have been a classic rescuer so over giving is in my nature.

Over giving is often in the nature of Healers, Artists, Therapists and can be linked to the Karpman Drama triangle ‘PVR’ triangle, where one becomes the Rescuer and gives tirelessly and eventually collapses with exhaustion or become either a victim or persecutor (see video).

“Work is Love made Visible” – Kahlil Gibran

We love our work but there needs to be some exchange because as a Creative Healer our work is our life, but we need to be able to tap into other sources so we can work better.

I like to use the percentage model with my clients; How much percentage does your work take? for example if it is 50% what are the percentages for other areas in your life? for a Healer therapist I believe rest should be very high on your list unless you have a specific project.  This model comes from a more complex model used by the Aztec healers explained by the now departed Healer Elena Avila in her book Women who Glows in the Dark. The Author explains the Aztec model for Healers in more detail.
It is really important for you to have a plan or an ethos for living as a pioneer because anything less would be detrimental to your growth.

Six ways to bring balance and self-care into your life.
1 Community (Partner /Friends/ Family)
2 Rest and Relaxation
3 Exercise
4 Going out in nature
5 Mediation, Prayer, Gratitude, Creativity
6 Healthy Food

If you would like to know more or have some support on self-care, please sign up for our newsletter and join our free course the Creative healing coaching course.